Selfish little Piggy.

OH MAN I'm SELFISH?
Dang.
Really?
So you mean I always want to get my own way, and do what I wanna do, and have things how I wanna have them, and live how I wanna live, and think how I wanna think?
Oops.
Yesterday, I went to see a comedy show starring my friend Matt Jones (who is a comedy genius).
And I wanted to leave by 10:15 so that I could be in bed by 10:30, since I had to wake up this morning by 6:00 to get to work by 7:30.
Sidenote- I don't know if you know me AT ALL, but I COVET my sleep. I mean, I get reeeeeally pissed when I can't get my full eight hours, like BEYOND what's considered a normal level of pissed, to a new EXTREME level that becomes annoying to the people around me (i'm sure) and puts me in a REALLY bad mood. I mean, I am turning RED and mad, and grunting and hissing and hurrying everybody around me.
SO, Matt's show went long, and I ended up leaving the bar at 10:30. Whatever, 15 minutes right? And then, I ended up getting home at 10:40.
You would think a normal response would have been: Who cares? It's fifteen minutes.
No, my friends.
Not only did I manage to wring myself into a huff like the Tasmanian devil, and hiss at everyone around me, and stomp my feet, and do the "pout" (girls you know what I'm talking about). I actually started to remind myself of Scarlett O'Hara in that one scene (well more like, in every scene).
And you should've seen poor Stunkel.
He was so sad.
He had tried so hard all night to promise me that he'd have me home on time, and then to actually get me there on time. And he had gone out of his way to plan our date, and to be kind throughout it, etc.
And I was just huffing and puffing away.
OOPS.
Anyway- I ended up having to apologize (because how could I NOT apologize?) and then kicking myself in the butt quite a bit for being mean to him.
GAW! Selfish.
The worse part is that this morning, the Holy Spirit reminded me that it doesn't matter how kind we are to someone when we're in a good mood. We can be kind to our worse enemy in a "good" mood. It's when we've been wronged, hurt, or are annoyed, mad (pick your adjective) that being kind to others (and gracious) really matters.
I'll be praying for that, then.
Also- I began to realize that the majority of what Jesus asks of us is that we put others before ourselves. How can I do that when I've barely been putting God himself before my own needs, desires, wants, etc?
I'll be praying for that too.